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It's true.

I am a horrible person. I was just reading one of my favorite Tumblrs, http://thegrammarnazi.tumblr.com/. I'm not the best at grammar, but I do try. Sometimes your hands just type things that your brain meant to be something else, like 'your' in place of 'you're'. Like that.

There are things that drive me bats, like 'span around' instead of 'spun around'. Like that, too.

Yesterday I was reading a fanfic from I don't know which blog, when I came across this, referring to someone who was waking from a coma. 'He regained his conscientiousness.' I can see (and have seen) mixing up 'conscious' and 'conscience' in the heat of fast typing, but seriously, 'conscientiousness'. Oh, he wasn't paying close enough attention to the work he was doing, but after I knocked him out cold, he regained his conscientiousness. Okay, that works for me.

See, I really am a horrible person. But I make me laugh.

Comments

( 9 comments — Leave a comment )
badly_knitted
Feb. 2nd, 2014 12:16 pm (UTC)
You make me laugh too, lol!

Seriously, some of the grammar and spelling in fics is truly dire, and it's made worse when the writer is gushing over their wonderful beta and the fic is littered with mistakes. If it looks that bad AFTER betaing, was it worse or better before? *sigh* If you have a beta, pick someone who can actually spell, use punctuation and has some understanding of grammar, not your best buddy who's as bad at everything as you are. It makes my poor little betaing heart break every time.

Though I do love fics that were written with autocorrect turned on. I read one where Gwen was wearing a necklace made of garments (garnets) and another where a pendant was in the shape of the Egyptian symbol the Eye of Horace!
excentric397
Feb. 2nd, 2014 08:12 pm (UTC)
Actually, it works better with 'he regained conscientiousness' rather than 'HIS conscientiousness'. Either way, I make me laugh. I am soooo funny. LOLOL

Wait. I think I've seen the Eye of Horace before. Met him in a bar? Or maybe not.

Autocorrect is definitely a mixed blessing. I was emailing a friend on my Fire once and it completely garbled the sentence about what we were going to do the next day that I was trying to type, into something about someone named Fred in Finland. IDEK.

I totally agree about the beta thing. I have seen some really mangled fics that were beta'd (betaed?) by a Rhesus monkey, I think. I would love to be a beta, but not sure I would catch all the Brit stuff, although I've read enough fan fiction now to be pretty familiar. I don't know what else is needed from a beta, though, besides checking spelling, grammar, etc.

Or continuity. Sometimes I read something that directly contradicts something a few paragraphs back. I hate when they do that on tv. Like Magnum. The first ep clearly stated that Robin Masters was the writer, and Higgins the majordomo. They even had 'invisible to us' Robin in one of the eps. It was always clear he was a real person (in the show) until towards the end, when the writers decided that Higgins was really Robin Masters. Do I LOOK like a moron? Well, possibly, but even I knew that was just stupid.

The whole writing thing makes me despair at the quality of education that seems to be prevalent. I like to think I had a good education growing up in Colorado, but when we moved to New England, my children did NOT get the same good education. Why? Now they educate to pass tests. Idiotic, in my really not very humble opinion. :) Jean
badly_knitted
Feb. 2nd, 2014 09:39 pm (UTC)
Oh lord, I SO agree about the state of education these days! No one seems to care if kids can spell or use punctuation properly, and it really shows on ff.net where there are so many teens posting fics. When I was at school, the teachers placed great emphasis on reading, writing and basic maths. Now, they just don't seem to bother.

I think you'd be great as a beta! Spelling, grammar and punctuation are the main points, but continuity and spotting glaring mistakes (like Ianto having brown eyes or Owen speaking with a Welsh accent) also help. Brit-picking is something some people ask for, but others don't need, but like when I beta in an American fandom, you do need to watch you don't fix things that are correct in that particular fandom, like if I was betaing Supernatural and changed 'trunk' to 'boot' (which I never have, but only because I keep in mind it's an American fandom. What I HAVE accidentally done a couple of times is to alter an American spelling to a British one by accident. In Britain we write colour, honour, humour, centre etc. where in Amedrica it's color, honor, humor, center.

On, than irritated the Hell out of me too - I loved Magnum, but Robin Masters was like Charlie in Charlie's Angels. He existed, you just never saw him. It was daft to say Higgins was really Masters all along. Most TV shows of the past didn't really seem to care about continuity and to be honest, Torchwood was the same, which annoyed me. RTD is no Joss Whedon. He changes things on a whim and ignores the consequences of events.

I'll keep you in mind if I need someone to beta for me. Mostly, I work with non-English people. Grammar tends to be the problem area for my clients because of the differences in word order and some confusion when it comes to tenses. I tend to fix spelling mistakes and incorrect words in the fic document, usually in red, then put suggestions for rephrasing sentences in a separate document, so the writer can choose which alternative works best for them. I also try, where possible, to explain WHY something isn't right, and I do my best to phrase suggestions tactfully because English is a tough language to learn if it's not your mother tongue anmd my writers do amazingly well, I don't want to knock their confidence.
excentric397
Feb. 2nd, 2014 10:30 pm (UTC)
I'd like to try it once, just to see if I can NOT completely muck it up. I have noticed that because I have read so much fanfic written by Brits, that I now put the 'u' in words we don't use 'u' in here in the states. Spellcheck always wags its finger at me when that happens. Sometimes I ignore spellcheck.

I recently watched the first couple Magnums on Netflix, and it just reminded me of how frustrated I had been when they came up with the whole 'Higgins is Masters' crap. Some viewers pay attention, even if some writers don't. Magnum and Rick and AJ, I mean Simon and Simon, were our Thursday night 'have the neighbors over for tv night' nights. With wine and other good things. Miss those days sometimes.

Let me know if you decide to risk a fic with me as beta. I like your methods, and will save that for future reference. I'm not really well-versed in tact, so my friends enjoy telling me, but I think I'm getting better. I refrain (mostly) from calling people 'you moron' when they say span instead of spun, anyway.
badly_knitted
Feb. 2nd, 2014 11:38 pm (UTC)
LOL! I'm tempted sometimes myself, when people write wonder instead of wander, or when they put alot instead of a lot. I avoid leaving reviews where I want to tell the writer to LEARN TO SPELL AND EDIT YOUR WORK! I swear some people just write something and post it without even bothering to read through it.

I don't know if we have to get our fics betaed for the bingo I'm trying my hand at, but if we do I'll definitely give you a chance to try your hand =)

I liked Simon ans Simon, but didn't get to see it often, I think it was on at the wrong time over here, either too late at night or it clashed with something mum wanted to watch, back before I got my own TV in my room. I have a lot of fond memories of the mrrican TV shows I used to watch when I was younger. Ah, nostalgia! Wish I could afford to get some of that stuff on DVD.
excentric397
Feb. 2nd, 2014 11:54 pm (UTC)
I'm still totally jealous that you get to see our shows, but we only get to see a selected few of yours on PBS and now BBCAMerica, if we get it with cable, which I don't. Besides, they show OUR shows like The Next Generation (Star Trek) on BBCAmerica. Seriously. My friend in Finland gets to see our shows. He was addicted to Desperate Housewives, in fact. LOL

I spend more time proof-reading and correcting than I do typing, because I am a terrible typist, it seems. Been typing for a bazillion years, and haven't really gotten a lot better. I remember in high school, my typing teacher said to me once, "Betty Jean, we are here to type words, not errors." Oops. LOLOL
badly_knitted
Feb. 3rd, 2014 12:51 pm (UTC)
I'm a one-finger typist and I make lots of mistakes, so I'm always correcting them. Sometimes a few slip through, mostly in comments. I try to catch them all, but sometimes I only notice as I'm clicking 'post'. I have a tendency to hit two keys at once, or = instead of backspace, lol!

We only get a handful of Americvan shows over here ast any given time,and it used to be that a lot of them were put on late at night or in the afternoon. Worse, often we only get half a series - that happened with the second season of Supernatural, we only got the first season and half of the second. We only got the first two seasons of Lost *shrugs* We haven't had Arrow over here, or Grimm, or Warehouse 13 (except on Satellite TV which I can't afford). We had the first half of Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. but we're still waiting for it to come back for the rea=st of the season. It's frustrating.
excentric397
Feb. 3rd, 2014 04:36 pm (UTC)
Okay, not so jealous anymore. LOL

badly_knitted
Feb. 3rd, 2014 04:54 pm (UTC)
Yeah, we start enjoying something and they stop showing it, lol! SO not fun!
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